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Entries in fail (11)

Monday
May172010

Disney: Closing Star Tours :(

Its a sad day kids :( Disney has announced the closure of Star Tours at Disneyland (Jul 27) and Disneyworld (Aug 8).  The ride is pushing 20+ years old and the "Imangineers" are giving the ride an overhaul.  The new version will consist of a pod race (think Episode I) on Tatooine.  If it wasn't bad enough George Lucas ruined retooled a franchise we all know and loved, the Jar Jar Binks mindset will now infect Disney. 

Come 2011 we'll be speeding around in pods with little Anakin.  Oh how could I forget the most important part... IT WILL BE IN 3D! blah.

Hat Tip

Thursday
May132010

Cadbury Roller Coaster Challenge

In merry old England, people don't celebrate the same freedoms we do here in the states.  The limeys cannot own guns, lock back knives, or create their own funny tv shows (British Humor is an oxymoron).  Thus they have to be a bit more creative with their fun time activities.  Cadbury, who you may remember from those goo filled eggs at Easter, has a theme park across the pond.  Speaking of which, hey Cadbury how's about you update those Easter commercials with the rabbits making animal sounds?  I've been seeing those same commercials for the past 20 years.  ANYWAY, to make theme parks more interesting Cadbury gives people ice cream and sends puts them on a crazy roller coaster, hilarity ensues. 

No Brits were harmed in the making of this youtube video.

Monday
Apr052010

KFC: The Double Down

I think I just threw up a little bit.  Listen folks, the Atkins diet has now become an underlying hypnotic message that the breadless bun-less food you are viewing is somewhat more "healthy" for you.  We've reached the pinnacle of ridiculous with KFC's new Double Down Sandwich.  Straight from the horse's chicken's mouth: 

This one-of-a-kind sandwich features two thick and juicy boneless white meat chicken filets (Original Recipe® or Grilled), two pieces of bacon, two melted slices of Monterey Jack and pepper jack cheese and Colonel's Sauce. This product is so meaty, there’s no room for a bun!

I agree bacon does make it better, but it will take more than bacon to make me ingest this piece of filth.  There is good news; I know that many people struggle with getting enough sodium in their diet.  This is become quite the challenge in our current fast food era, but not to worry because this sandwich boasts over 50% of the sodium your body needs!  

If you would like more information you can visit the official site and watch the count down until your arteries close the sandwich is released. 

Thursday
Apr012010

Your Hotel Room Is Not Safe pt. 2

Well friends, your hotel room is not safe.  All it takes is a rubber band to defeat that little sliding lock you felt so safe behind.  Since all hotel doors have peep holes is the chain really necessary?  You can see who is out side anyway, and I'm not sure I'd wager safety on a small chain and a door open 3 inches to see if it is the pizza man or cucuy.  Also, if I remember correctly aren't those sliding looks considerably higher up on the door than right above the handle?  Enjoy this instructional educational video. 

hat tip gizmodo

Thursday
Mar252010

Modern Warfare 2: Stimulus Package

When Battlefield Bad Company 2 dropped, tons of the MW2 fans jumped ship.  Listen folks, MW2 was a great game and I wasted spent many, many hours playing it.  Truth be told, like anything else, it gets a little tired.  The problems I've had with the game become more frustrating by the hour, and I really don't feel like taking the pointless prestige route.  There are only so many challenges you can do, and I think I've unlocked enough emblem pictures. 

So how does Infinity Ward respond to their clients leaving for another game?  The Stimulus Package!  A map pack sporting 5 new maps (two of them from the original Modern Warfare).... and that's it!  No new challenges, no new weapons, no new missions, simply maps.  All for the low, low price of $15.  Meh.  It is going to take a lot more than a few new maps to get me back.  Hell, if Infinity Ward would have spent that effort on banning hackers I might possibly consider it. 

The other fear I have for this expansion is that the new maps would never be accessible.  Why you might ask?  Because you can't effing pick a map in MW2!  The server will randomly pick maps for you, thus the new maps you paid for will be at a random selection process with the maps you've already played the hell out of!  Infinity Ward, I really hope you can get your ducks in a row before MW3.  As for now, BC2 is my winner.